Previs edit v11 feedback from VFX veteran Tom Dow
His comments have been great and I have taken all of them on board and agree with a lot of them. Since I am so close to this production it is always great to get an outsiders point of view.
Here are Tom's notes
The meteor short looks good! The shots really buzz along nicely for much of the short and I think that the rest will knit together well with a little more work. Here are my impressions (frame numbers are very general):
- frame 001: Be careful not to have your camera re-trace (or nearly re-trace) it's path. It seems to be pulling back at first, then moving forward. This is a giveaway that your camera is CG.
- frame 320-360 This shot seems out of place in it's flatness. Your main actor (the meteor) is moving parallel to the film plane rather than in depth, as with your other shots.
- frame 370-430 Nice sequence. It cuts well.
- frame 470 Not much focus here. The action is at the edge of frame.
- frame 570-620 A very "busy" camera. Too much rotation makes the camera seem weightless and CG, IMO. It hooks at the end, too.
- frame 730-820 A nice wide shot at the start, and good use of the bus to motivate the cuts.
- frame 850-900 You could pull the camera back a bit to get the bus completely in frame and avoid a jump cut with the previous shot. This shot is about the crack. The "story" of the bus is over at this point.
- frame 950-1090 This shot seemed confusing, then it occurred to me that you might be setting up the idea that the meteor was a capsule or an egg for some sort of creature or mechanism which bursts out once it is buried. That would make sense. If that were the case, though, I would not have 950-1090 be about a continuing crack, since you have already gone underground on the previous shot. Rather, it could be a short "rest" period before the ground explodes again. How to handle that is up to you.
In general: consider adding a super wide shot. Show the skyline.
Below is the first pass of edits to the shots working on the notes given on the shots.